Recently I took a group of our student ministry volunteers to a one-day conference hosted by the Rethink Group called Orange. I have had a couple of opportunities to go to their yearly conference in Atlanta and it is great! So when the opportunity arose to get a one-day shot of the Orange Conference here locally.... I thought it would be great for some of our volunteers to hear and see about this idea.

The idea is that the color yellow represents light (the church) and red represents love and nurturing (the family). Together the two colors make orange. A partnership of church and family in raising and teaching our kids. That's a very quick overview, but you get the picture.

As a parent I recognize the need for other adults speaking truth into my kid's lives. It doesn't matter if they are saying the same thing I've been saying for years..... if that's what it takes for my kids to hear it..... then okay.

There is a show on MTV called Sweet Sixteen. If you have never seen it, check it out sometime. If you're like me one episode will be plenty. One word of caution.... your i.q. may drop a few points just being exposed to some of the stupidity. Basically it is a show about these kids with wealthy parents and the outlandish parties and gifts they get when they turn 16. Some of the stuff is unbelievable. One of the problems is that it can create a warped sense of reality for those of us that spend our time mingling with the normals.

One of the many problems I have with some of the attitudes on the show is..... when did it become more about what we give to our kids, or do for our kids than what we leave in them? There are so many things that are more important than the stuff I can give them or do for them.

Things like.... do they have an authentic relationship with God (do they know what that looks like by watching me)? Or.... do they know that I will always have their back? Or what about remembering that my wife and I are not the only adult influences in their life?

I think that over the years, we as parents have been given so many lists of what it takes to be a good parent that we feel like we just can't match up. So many christian authors have weighed in on what you should be doing or not doing, what the kids should or should not watch, what type of music they should or should not listen to, etc.... that we as parents begin to form some sort of checklist and when we can't check things off of the list..... we've failed.

Here's some encouragement mom and dad. Adam and Eve..... caused the downfall of the human race and raised a son who killed his brother; Noah... drinking problem; Abraham.... offered his wife up to someone else; Rebekah schemed to deceive her husband; David, Eli, Jacob......all had parenting issues. But just like them..... our humanness does not prevent God from using us.

God is at work in your family. Restoration and redemption are stories that your family can tell like no other family. And people need to hear your story. It's not about being perfect parents. It's about the legacy you leave in your kids when it comes to a relationship with God through His son Jesus. There is no "right" kind of parent level that you have to achieve to be used by God in the life of your kid.

Paul gave us, what I think is a pretty good blue print of a family structure....

Ephesians 6:1...."children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right."

Ephesians 5:24....."now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands."

Ephesians 5:25...."husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."

Each family member's response to each other should reflect the attitude and response of Christ to them personally.

Reggie Joiner, founder of the Rethink Group, says in his book Think Orange......"the family exists, even in its imperfection, to display the heart of God to every generation." Don't beat yourself up mom and dad for the things you can't do or give...... leave your kids with something that will impact them forever.